You may have good ideas, but you can’t force people to embrace them. Effective use of influence and persuasion will help you build trusting and respectful relationships. And in turn, you’ll be better able to secure support for your ideas and lead successfully through change.
The terms influence and persuasion are usually used interchangeably in this context. Consider what these terms encompass
- Influence affects change or action without using authority or control. And persuasion is a form of communication that uses logical arguments and evidence to gain support. Neither involves overpowering, bullying, pushing, or coercing to get what you want.
- Exchanges based on the use of influence and persuasion are characterized by equality, caring, and respect for the ideas and logic of all contributors. Together, they’re used to inspire, motivate, resolve conflicts, sell ideas, change values, establish vision, and educate and empower others.
Three things provide the foundation for effective influence
- Communication – As a leader, your communication skills impact your ability to influence others. Skilled communicators are more effective influencers and better leaders. The key to successful persuasion is to show how the achievement of what you want will also help others achieve something they want. In this way, the purpose, goal, or objective becomes a common one.
- Personal power – As a leader, your personal power is derived from a combination of your knowledge, abilities, and skills, as well as from your character and personality. These are the assets you can draw on in your leadership role. There are four key sources of personal power: referent power, expertise, previous success, and social competence.
- Credibility – Your influence is also based on your credibility, which is derived from approaches and values like focus, flexibility, fairness, accountability, approachability, and honesty. When others know that you exhibit these attributes and apply them consistently, you build your credibility.
Why to Influence
Although there are other important people in your work life, your leaders is special because he or she is both an evaluator of your performance and the main source of the resources and rewards you seek. Your leaders may also be the key to your career advancement.
Being able to influence your leaders is critically important to your success as an employee. The extent to which you can influence that person will go a long way to determining:
- The level of resources you’ll have available
- The opportunities you’ll have for career growth
- The degree of autonomy you’ll be given
- Your financial rewards
How to Influence
- Provide a Context for Your Message – They’re busy. When talking with your boss, remind them of what you are doing so there is no confusion. By adding a pretext to your question it adds power to getting the answer you want. If people are confused they usually don’t do anything.
- Be Direct, Crisp and Brief – Bosses don’t want to play guessing games with you. Think and organize what you want to say before talking to them. Brevity is a highly sought after skill.
- Anticipate Questions and Needs for Information – Be prepared before any meeting with your boss on questions or concerns he or she may have.
- Learn the Boss’s Style of Writing or Relating to Others – Communicate in the ingredients important to them and not to you. If you always communicate in your style to everyone you meet, you will miss the mark about 75% of the time.
- Accept Criticism in Stride – The best way to handle an argument is to avoid it. If criticized, don’t become defensive. Thank them for the feedback and ask for suggestions for improvement.
- Take Praise Well – Don’t negate praise or show false modesty. When you are praised, just say “thank you.”
- Correct Your Boss with Tact – If your boss makes a mistake, don’t say “you’re wrong about …..” instead say something like, “I wonder if we should take another look at ….”
- Praise but don’t Flatter – You don’t want to look like a ‘kiss up’ by always saying how great the boss it. Boss’s need praise and recognition to. Just make sure you give it when it is deserved.
- Don’t Offer Unsolicited Promises to Gain Favor – Make sure all your promises are backed up with actions. If you make a promise and don’t fulfill it your reputation will be hurt. A good philosophy to follow is to under-promise and over-deliver.