{"id":58445,"date":"2020-05-07T11:00:27","date_gmt":"2020-05-07T05:30:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.vskills.in\/certification\/blog\/?p=58445"},"modified":"2024-04-03T13:23:23","modified_gmt":"2024-04-03T07:53:23","slug":"dealing-with-the-interpersonal-problems","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vskills.in\/certification\/blog\/dealing-with-the-interpersonal-problems\/","title":{"rendered":"Dealing with the Interpersonal Problems"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>&#8220;Among the touchiest, most explosive problems an executive must face,&#8221; says Lee J. Smith, president of Tri-Tex Advertising, of Dallas, &#8220;are those dealing with attitudes, values, or habits of subordinates.&#8221; What&#8217;s referred to here are situations that arise on the work scene that cannot be dealt with on a simple matter-of-fact basis.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example: A valued employee tells you he&#8217;s leaving for another job. You must fire a subordinate. An employee complains to you about the offensive body odor of a neighboring worker. Problems of this type can tax an executive&#8217;s understanding of people, and his resourcefulness in developing satisfactory solutions. In the pages ahead, you&#8217;ll find some of the most challenging interpersonal situations that turn up on the work scene, and suggestions for dealing with them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>WHEN AN EMPLOYEE SAYS, &#8220;I QUIT!&#8221; <\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>When a\nvalued employee unexpectedly tells you he plans to resign, there may be a good\ndeal at stake in your reaction. Consider these points: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>1. Decide what the employee really wants.<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>Harold Ickes, Secretary of the Interior under President Roosevelt, used to &#8220;quit&#8221;\u2014again and again. &#8220;Mr. President,&#8221; he&#8217;d say, &#8220;I&#8217;ve got to leave.&#8221; To which the President would reply: &#8220;Now Harold, what is the matter?&#8221; Roosevelt sensed that Ickes didn&#8217;t really want to leave. What he wanted was a sympathetic ear. The good executive follows Roosevelt&#8217;s example.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>He listens to the words the employee says, and looks for the meaning behind him. Of course, there are some employees who talk about quitting, when they really want a raise. Here are some of the other gambits that are used:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;I\nhave another job and I&#8217;m giving you notice.&#8221; &#8220;I&#8217;m thinking about\nleaving.&#8221; &#8220;I&#8217;m just not happy. Perhaps I ought to leave.&#8221; Each\nof these speeches means something different. The first is final. The last is so\ntentative, it&#8217;s obvious this employee can be made to stay\u2014if you want him. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>2. Decide if you want to keep the employee.<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>There&#8217;s a natural response you must make when someone says, &#8220;I want to walk out.&#8221; The executive tends to object\u2014and perhaps he shouldn&#8217;t. If you believe the employee is serious about leaving, mentally review the record, decide on the spot if this is a valuable employee. If he&#8217;s not, clearly you shouldn&#8217;t try to keep him. A certain amount of turnover is healthy, brings in new blood. A quit in some cases can be a desirable development. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>3. Get the employee&#8217;s story.<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>When an employee walks in and says he&#8217;s through, ask yourself, &#8220;Is there something causing a problem in this man&#8217;s work situation?&#8221; Maybe it&#8217;s going to affect other men under your supervision. Maybe it already has. How do you find out? By encouraging the employee to talk freely. You want him to tell his story. That story may suggest what&#8217;s gone wrong. It certainly will suggest lines of questioning. Needless to say, the executive has to be careful that nothing the employee says elicits argument or criticism. You must be a fact finder in this situation, not a judge. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>4. Get the &#8220;picture.<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;Let&#8217;s say the employee has told you his story. But your mind&#8217;s been racing: thinking of what another employee let slip last week, what one of your fellow managers said, and so on. What you&#8217;re doing is seeking the real reason for this employee&#8217;s desire to leave. A quit may be a complicated thing. Experienced executives find that employees who say they&#8217;re quitting for one reason may have different, more basic reasons. You can find the deeper reasons by tactful questioning after the employee tells his story. And, perhaps, the employee&#8217;s statement suggests questions to be asked of the employee&#8217;s co-workers, one&#8217;s own colleagues, Personnel, if need be. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>5. Decide how far to go.<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p style=\"text-align:left\">Based on what you learn, you decide whether the employee is serious about leaving or just wants some handholding\u2014or a raise. You may want to offer inducements. But watch out. Don&#8217;t make unrealistic promises that only kickback. Regardless of how good a man is, it&#8217;s wiser to let him go than to make efforts to keep him that you&#8217;ll regret later on. In general, your moves are likely to take you in three directions. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Eliminate or alleviate a source of dissatisfaction. &#8220;I just can&#8217;t start at nine,&#8221; a typist may say. You may want to permit her to make a change\u2014start at nine-thirty\u2014keeping in mind that your reasons must be good enough to explain to others why you did so in one case, and are not bound to do so in another. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Offer reassurance. In some cases, an employee may actually have better prospects in his present job\u2014the chance for a better position, higher wage bracket\u2014than he&#8217;s aware of. Make sure, then, that if an employee is dissatisfied because he sees no chance to improve his situation, that he&#8217;s set straight\u2014if it&#8217;s in the cards. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Offer tangible improvement. It may be anything from special privileges\nto a raise (if deserved). But, again, there must be justice and logic in the\nmove, to protect you from a parade of &#8220;quits,&#8221; aimed at winning some\nadvantage. Finally, if you think a man is too good to lose, you may want to\npass the question upstairs, let your superior in on the problem. There may be steps\nthat he knows about, that he will feel are worth taking for a key employee. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>HOW TO FIRE <\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p style=\"text-align:left\">Of all the\nsituations that confront the executive, the one that seems to put him through\nthe wringer, that represents the greatest personal ordeal, is that of firing a\nsubordinate. And, strangely, this fact may be true even when the dismissal is\nfully justified or when the prospects for the reemployment of the individual\nare excellent. When you must fire an individual, these steps insure that you\nare being fair, and minimize the possible adverse effects: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">1<strong>. Use existing procedures.<\/strong> <\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>Your company probably has a specified method for dismissal. While the details of such a procedure may differ from one company to another, generally the steps follow a pattern. For example, unacceptable conduct calls for\u2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 A verbal warning informing the subordinate of what he is doing wrong\nand possible consequences. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 A written warning informing the employee that the offense is continuing\nand that his job is hanging in the balance. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 A final warning to the employee informing him that if by a specified\ntime the infraction has not stopped, he is liable to dismissal. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>2. Back-up for your decision <\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>If you are on the point of firing an employee, it&#8217;s desirable that\u2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 You have some kind of written record in which the history of the\nemployee has been kept. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 If the employee is supervised by a manager on your staff, remind him that a dossier should be kept in case the decision is in question. The record should contain dates and descriptions of the infractions and corroborating evidence or statements, if available. 3. The actual firing should give the employee a chance to have his say. But for the executive&#8217;s part, it must be a firm but friendly parting of the ways. If the situation permits, the executive may insure the constructive aspects of the action by\u2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Commenting on the favorable or worthwhile aspects of the employee&#8217;s\ntenure. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Making suggestions as to possible future employment. If the employee\nraises the question of references for a future employer, you may tell him at\nthis time just what you feel you can say honestly, that will either help him\nget a job or at least not interfere with his job finding efforts. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>How To Fire An Executive <\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>To begin\nwith, very few executives are ever fired. (When they are, it may become\nfront-page news. Remember the furor caused by the firing of the president of\nthe Ford Motor Company in 1969?) One reason the top echelons are usually\nfire-safe is that while lower-level employees are still, in a sense,\n&#8220;hired hands,&#8221; executives are &#8220;family.&#8221; Other reasons: it&#8217;s\nbad public relations; it hardly speaks well of the management that hired him.\nHowever, executives obviously are separated from time to time. Here are some of\nthe methods used to bring about a parting of the ways: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u25a0 The Siberia assignment.<\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>An executive is given an undesirable task, a come-down from what he&#8217;s been doing. He usually takes the hint. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u25a0 New assignment: <\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;Find yourself another job.&#8221; Usually on full pay, and even without a time limit, the manager is told to seek another affiliation. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u25a0 &#8220;We&#8217;ll help you find something else.<\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8221; Some companies retain guidance counselors, employment agencies or executive recruiters to help their undesirables get new situations. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u25a0 The bypass technique. <\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>This harsh method is sometimes employed when no top executive is willing to face the man and tell him he&#8217;s through. Instead, his name starts being omitted from important memoranda; he&#8217;s excluded from conferences; etc. Eventually, he catches on and starts job-hunting. No matter what technique is used to break the news, even when the man is told directly that he&#8217;s through, the art of face-saving has been highly refined. Devices like these are considered almost mandatory: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u25a0 &#8220;He has chosen to resign.<\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8221; For example: &#8220;Our vice-president is leaving us because he&#8217;s always wanted to go into consulting.&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u25a0 &#8220;It&#8217;s a matter of health.<\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8221; For example: &#8220;J.D.s wife needs a change of climate, and so, reluctantly, we must accept his decision to leave. . . .&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u25a0 &#8220;He&#8217;s gotten an attractive offer.<\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8221; For example: &#8220;Tom was offered an opportunity he couldn&#8217;t afford to refuse. . . .&#8221; One of the reasons for management squeamishness in this area is the identification, often subconscious, of the executive who has decided to fire, with the firee. &#8220;There but for the grace . . . etc., etc.&#8221; However, much of the sensitivity about firing relates to an obsolete tradition. These days, executives tend to be professionally much more mobile, and with the aid of career counselors and execu-tive recruiters, the executive job market is a fairly lively place. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong> When Beauty Becomes An Ugly Problem<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>The\nexecutive, told that a beautiful girl may represent a work problem, is likely\nto say, &#8220;It&#8217;s a problem I&#8217;d like to have.&#8221; He probably is\nunderestimating the magnitude of the complications that may arise. It&#8217;s said\nthat beauty is skin deep. But that&#8217;s deep enough to cause trouble. Executives\nface these difficulties: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Favoritism. Justly or otherwise, they are accused of treating the Keen Kates better than the Plain Janes. And, sometimes, attempt-ing to lean over backward to avoid the digs, executives have been blamed by the super beauties of unfair treatment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Social whirlpool. The beautiful employee becomes the center of a situation that may involve one or more ardent admirers, or one or more envious females. And it&#8217;s even been known to happen that the presence of a latter-day Helen has caused upset even in the executive echelons, when a higher-placed official may be drawn into the emotional maelstrom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>At any rate, if you decide in favor of beauty on the job to the point of recruiting and hiring one or more, it is helpful to know what to do and what not to do to prevent the beauty queen from turning the executive suite into an overheated trouble spot: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>1.<\/strong> <strong>Avoid the ridiculous.<\/strong> <\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>Don&#8217;t try to keep admiring colleagues in line by adopting arbitrary rules of the &#8220;boys can&#8217;t talk to girls&#8221; variety. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>2.<\/strong> <strong>Build an invisible barrier.<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>The executive who knows how to play it cool builds a sense of propriety into the working atmosphere. For example, horseplay or teasing on a boy-girl basis is kept within reasonable bounds. Or, if a girl must work overtime or come in on Saturday, she shares the work with another girl. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>(A press dispatch from Manila sometime ago described how a local executive, in an effort to keep excessive romance under control set up a rule prohibiting &#8220;overtime for attractive female employees.&#8221; The press dispatch did not say how he was ever able to get any female volunteers for overtime thereafter.) <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>3. Apply the rule of reason.<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>Appeal to the common sense of the girl who is too popular for her own good. Make it clear that the office is a public place. Conduct that might be perfectly proper at a summer resort or the beach is not necessarily acceptable at a desk. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Try to prevent explosions. Of course, any relationships after hours and\noff the premises are outside your province. But when a situation is causing\ndifficulties on the job, discreet action is called for. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u25a0 Keep the conversation businesslike. Make it clear that your concern is\nfor the smooth progress of the work and the state of mind of others who may be\naffected. To emphasize the friendliness in your approach, you may want to use\nthe &#8220;people are beginning to notice&#8221; line. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h5 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>4. Final step<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n<p>Transfer or dismissal? If your low-pressure, friendly efforts fail, if the consequences are becoming increasingly serious, you may want to warn the man in the case that if he cannot cope with the situation, someone may have to be transferred, even dis-charged. Remember, under no circumstances, can the executive in such a delicate situation, see himself either as a censor or a wet blanket. A cardinal rule should be to make no move unless there is actual interference in the work of the department.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vskills.in\/certification\/management\/leadership-communication-professional\"><strong>Certified Leadership Communication Professional<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Among the touchiest, most explosive problems an executive must face,&#8221; says Lee J. Smith, president of Tri-Tex Advertising, of Dallas, &#8220;are those dealing with attitudes, values, or habits of subordinates.&#8221; What&#8217;s referred to here are situations that arise on the work scene that cannot be dealt with on a simple matter-of-fact basis. For example: A&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":967,"featured_media":58460,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_joinchat":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[1533],"tags":[7161,7198,2061],"class_list":["post-58445","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-management-2","tag-become-a-certified-professional","tag-certified-leadership-communication-professional","tag-vskills-certifications"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Dealing with the Interpersonal Problems - Vskills Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Dealing with Interpersonal Problems\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.vskills.in\/certification\/blog\/dealing-with-the-interpersonal-problems\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dealing with the Interpersonal Problems - 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